The Truth About Adoption

coz Adoption mythology hurtsTruthful Views of Adoption Practices in the USA today

Adoption is supposed to be about finding families for the children that need homes. That is the way adoption is sold to society in a carefully homed marketing message as controlled by the adoption industry and reported on by the mass media.

Finding Faults in Current Adoption Practices is NOT “Anti-Adoption”

The truth is that the adoption system is greatly flawed. It is a profit driven industry. Both adoptive parents and natural parents are exploited for what they bring to the table: money for fees and children for transfer. The children adopted are treated like a commodity with the transfer of parental rights to a child bought and sold.

To point out the truthful views of adoption and to say “adopting is wrong” is not a fault of the speaker. It does not represent bad character, or an unpleasant personal experience, or a need for medication or prayer. To consider a person “Anti-Adoption” can be seen as an insult, but please become educated on what a person is seeking from that view point before dismissing these views as something simplest such as wanting to see children kept in foster care, abused or in orphanages.  It is a flaw of the adoption system and only by shedding light on the negatives, can we make positive change for the benefits of ALL involved in adoption.

Coercion and Forced Adoption Practices Are Currently Happening in this Country

While many people might be open to acknowledging the foundation of forced adoption during the Baby Scoop Era, frequently such acknowledgement is followed with the declaration that “Adoption is different now“.

Unfortunately, this cannot be further form the truth. While the overall look and feel of adoption has changed from the maternity homes and openly punitive adoption practices accepted during the 50’s, 60’s and early 70’s in the USA,  unethical practices and stalled legal maneuverings still support the forced separation of mothers and fathers from their children.

In most case, the original parents of the child do not have the means to financially battle the adoption agencies in the court of law and they lose. In other cases, the pressure and insurmountable obstacles put in front of parents trying to either not give or revoke relinquishment consent are  just more than they have the means to overcome. They are in over their heads, battling a multi-armed  industry that wants to beat them down into submission and surrender. Agencies have been known to lie, provide inaccurate information, take advantage of parents in extremely vulnerable times, pit families against each other, stall for time to allow import legal dates to pass, hold children literally as hostages, and in general cheat able, willing, loving parents out of their children.

The forced and unethical adoption of Veronica Brown is only the tip of the iceberg. As there are so many stories that reach my ears these days and as I am so damn tired of being told, “that does not  happen anymore”, this page will serve as a clearing house for true stories of modern day adoption coercion.

Adoption cases regarding the biological father being denied his paternal rights and custody to his own child can be found on the Father’s Right pages as well.

Please also familiarize yourself with  the truth about the adoption industry today including the business model, their own market research, their history and how it is truly a 3 billion dollar profit driven industry.

Understand the Cultural Views on Adoption that continue to allow these unethical practices to flourish while we all look the other way and  tell ourselves that “Adoption is Beautiful’ and all about the “best interests” of the poor “unwanted” children.

And please understand that the Adoption laws in each state are NOT created to protect either the children, nor the parents, but instead have been changed via the force of the adoption lobby groups to make “adoption easier” for the agencies and attorneys whose clients are ultimately the adoptive parents who pay them thousands of dollars.

Adoption Agencies with Questionable Ethical Processes

This is by no means a full list of agencies at all. There are many many more, these just happen to be ones that I personally looked into and have written about here.  

Coercive and Unethical Adoption Practices

If you have experienced an unethical forced adoption surrender or were lied to, tricked, deceived, or had broken promises made in order to get your child for adoption, please let me know! If you are an adoptive parent who has witness such wrong doings please share your experiences here. It is only when we work together to cal attention to these truths and make the unethical agencies accountable can we really FIX ADOPTION!

Most Recent Posts Demonstrating Current Unethical Adoption Practices in the USA

Donna Ames Isn’t As Innocent As She Claims To Be

bringbabyelliotthome copy

Why was Donna able to bring Kimberly to court to sign a pre-birth consent but did not complete the process that Donna initiated when she was informed that Kimberly would NOT be going through with an adoption? As an attorney, she led her into a legal process and then removed herself from the situation and left Kimberly with no legal representation to assure that her wishes, to parent her baby, were indeed carried out. At the very least, what Donna did was not ethical by the standards set forth in most Bar Associations. read more…

Let Me Just Clarify; More Details of the Adoption Rocks Donna Ames Adoption Ring

right before his two week check up

So, tell me again, Donna, how it was clear to Kimberly that you were not representing her best interests as well. In fact, the ethical thing that an attorney would do, you know, one that has ethics, would be to withdraw the pre-birth consent upon being told by a pregnant mother she does not wish to continue with an adoption. Instead Donna withdrew herself from the case to keep her hands from looking dirty, well, in my opinion. I don’t know exactly why Donna didn’t withdraw the pre-birth consent for Kim, who was obviously unaware that it needed to be done. I can only assume it’s because she has no ethics. Other people seem to agree with that opinion. read more…

Wrongful Adoption: Return Baby Elliott, Part I

James Elliott Rossler at two weeks old

Kim made one phone call that changed her life dramatically. She thought she was calling an adoption agency by the name of Adoption Rocks – the first to pop up in her Google search. Unbeknownst to her, she was in fact she was calling an attorney named Donna Ames who called her back Sunday evening at 6pm and arranged for them to meet for lunch the very next day read more…

Wrongful Adoption: Return Baby Elliott, Part II

four days old.=

Kim has been told now that she needed to withdraw her pre-birth consent in writing, something she was never told. She was, in fact, told that final papers would be signed after the birth and that she then had five days to withdraw.

Judge Don Davis, who signed the consent is on the Board of Directors of Adoption Rocks, and Donna Ames, the attorney for Adoption Rocks – who was the only attorney “representing” Kim, is a major donor to Judge Davis’ re-election campaign, making this case and all other adoptions of Adoption Rocks reek of conflict of interest, misrepresentation, fraud, deception, and undue influence. read more…

Adoption Rocks Ponzi Scheme and the Donna Ames Empire

Adoption ' rocks" unethcial baby kidnapping in Alabama

Unregulated, unchecked, adoption industry run a muck. That’s what this is. And here we have Kim. Her child ripped away from her. Kate Sharp, of Harbert Realty in Birmingham, Alabama, the woman she still thinks would be a good mom. This woman made all of this come together. Her own selfish desires to be a mother instigated the legal kidnapping of SOMEONE ELSE’S BABY because of a legal loophole (and poor legal representation and legal advice). How could anyone take someone else’s baby if they didn’t want to give it to you. How does Kate sleep with herself at night? read more…

Presenting the Birthmother Perspective at the NYSCCC Conference in May 2015

Help Shape OUR Birthmother Presentation; In my head, I am telling the story, presenting facts and research that supports what I am saying, with actual quotes by YOU ALL showing on the screen. I would very much to have some really good images of moms that can help break apart every possible stereotype and open that door to get them thinking more. Even if it turns out that maybe there are only six stories that get highlighted, at least it’s not just mine. So like I always say, your voices will give my presentation WAY more credibility. read more…

Pretty Much a Birthmother’s Nightmare


I mean thank GOD that I had at least a warning that they were going to be there. Can you image if you didn’t expect your agency and they were in your face! They are just lucky that I HAD mentally prepared or the emotional side of me might have taken hold and I might not have been civil and gracious. In fact, the right thing to do on their part would have been to send me a email or note before hand, explaining that they were going to be there for their CEUs and that IF I was open to it, then they would like to take the opportunity to say hello face to face. At least that would have considered my needs and treated me like a valuable person worth of an opinion and having valid feelings. Instead, I somehow feel again like “just a birthmother” whose feelings come last and just don’t matter. That will not work for me anymore! read more…

Illinois SB1670 Decreasing the Rights of Natural Parents to Their Children

More Garbage the Pretends to “Save” Babies; There is an amendment comin’ down the pike that will make it even more difficult for a mother who may have relinquished her infant under Illinois’ Abandoned Newborn Infant Protection Act change her mind and get her child back. And will codify that the child will have a foundling birth certificate. read more…

Opposition to Adoptee Rights in Missouri

Missouri Adoptee Rights Legisaltion and OBC access

Help Missouri Adoptees

It is URGENT that Adoptee Rights supporters come out in full force Monday March 16th. This is the hearing for the agency bill HB1112, and we need to show strong opposition. We need to gather anyone who can be there IN PERSON to support HB647. They don’t all have to speak, and they can be friends, neighbors, co-workers whoever can fill seats on our behalf. read more…

Arkansas Bill HB 1648 Would Prohibit ‘Rehoming’ Adopted Children

A Positive Change Brought about by the Justin Harris Mess; HOUSE BILL 1648 PROHIBIT PRIVATE TRANSFERS OF ADOPTED 9 CHILDREN EXCEPT TO RELATIVES If HB 1648 is passed, then Adoption Rehoming in Arkansas will be a felony! read more…

Finally! Accurate Data on Profits in Adoption

380 .9 million profits adoption

So if out of the 14.1 billion is 100% of the revenue, adoption’s 8.2% equals $1,156,200,000.00 in revenue and out of the $380,900,000.00 in profits, adoption’s 8.2% portion results in $31,233,800.00.
Now this “adoption” category does includes both licensed agencies and unlicensed facilitators that arrange adoptions, but does NOT seem to include the attorneys and legal fees.
So REALLY if we want to sound like we know what we are talking about then Adoption services by agencies and facilitators ALONE are supposed to bring in over 30 MILLION dollars in PROFIT in 2015. read more…

Sexism within the OBC Adoption Records Issue

When a man fathers a child and chooses, for whatever reason, to ignore the existence of that child, do we respect his wishes overall and grant him his right to his anonymity? No.. so why do mothers receive this “protection” ? Why are we ONLY concerned with the mothers? If this fear was legitimate, then wouldn’t it be fair and expected to extend that concerned to the father’s as well? Should not all people be protected, then, from long lost relatives that might infringe upon their lives and seek out relationships with them? read more…

So You Have Had a Run in with Those Anti-Adoption People

So You Have Had a Run in with Those Anti-Adoption People

The simple fact is that these “negative” feelings about adoption DO exist and are VERY REAL. And while I understand that society and the media and the adoption professionals have not prepared you for this, if you are choosing to enter into the world of adoption, you actually don’t get to pick and choose a version of reality that you like best. Again, you can choose not to listen and hear them, but it’s all still here. We are not making this stuff up. read more…

Adoption and the The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills

One of the housewives, Lisa Vanderpump, adopted her now 22 years old son, Max, from foster care. And in between some party prep and cat fights, there are two scenes in this episode dealing with Lisa and Max who is “suddenly” interested in doing DNA testing for his genetic heritage. read more…