The Truth About Adoption

coz Adoption mythology hurtsTruthful Views of Adoption Practices in the USA today

Adoption is supposed to be about finding families for the children that need homes. That is the way adoption is sold to society in a carefully homed marketing message as controlled by the adoption industry and reported on by the mass media.

Finding Faults in Current Adoption Practices is NOT “Anti-Adoption”

The truth is that the adoption system is greatly flawed. It is a profit driven industry. Both adoptive parents and natural parents are exploited for what they bring to the table: money for fees and children for transfer. The children adopted are treated like a commodity with the transfer of parental rights to a child bought and sold.

To point out the truthful views of adoption and to say “adopting is wrong” is not a fault of the speaker. It does not represent bad character, or an unpleasant personal experience, or a need for medication or prayer. To consider a person “Anti-Adoption” can be seen as an insult, but please become educated on what a person is seeking from that view point before dismissing these views as something simplest such as wanting to see children kept in foster care, abused or in orphanages.  It is a flaw of the adoption system and only by shedding light on the negatives, can we make positive change for the benefits of ALL involved in adoption.

Coercion and Forced Adoption Practices Are Currently Happening in this Country

While many people might be open to acknowledging the foundation of forced adoption during the Baby Scoop Era, frequently such acknowledgement is followed with the declaration that “Adoption is different now“.

Unfortunately, this cannot be further form the truth. While the overall look and feel of adoption has changed from the maternity homes and openly punitive adoption practices accepted during the 50’s, 60’s and early 70’s in the USA,  unethical practices and stalled legal maneuverings still support the forced separation of mothers and fathers from their children.

In most case, the original parents of the child do not have the means to financially battle the adoption agencies in the court of law and they lose. In other cases, the pressure and insurmountable obstacles put in front of parents trying to either not give or revoke relinquishment consent are  just more than they have the means to overcome. They are in over their heads, battling a multi-armed  industry that wants to beat them down into submission and surrender. Agencies have been known to lie, provide inaccurate information, take advantage of parents in extremely vulnerable times, pit families against each other, stall for time to allow import legal dates to pass, hold children literally as hostages, and in general cheat able, willing, loving parents out of their children.

The forced and unethical adoption of Veronica Brown is only the tip of the iceberg. As there are so many stories that reach my ears these days and as I am so damn tired of being told, “that does not  happen anymore”, this page will serve as a clearing house for true stories of modern day adoption coercion.

Adoption cases regarding the biological father being denied his paternal rights and custody to his own child can be found on the Father’s Right pages as well.

Please also familiarize yourself with  the truth about the adoption industry today including the business model, their own market research, their history and how it is truly a 3 billion dollar profit driven industry.

Understand the Cultural Views on Adoption that continue to allow these unethical practices to flourish while we all look the other way and  tell ourselves that “Adoption is Beautiful’ and all about the “best interests” of the poor “unwanted” children.

And please understand that the Adoption laws in each state are NOT created to protect either the children, nor the parents, but instead have been changed via the force of the adoption lobby groups to make “adoption easier” for the agencies and attorneys whose clients are ultimately the adoptive parents who pay them thousands of dollars.

Adoption Agencies with Questionable Ethical Processes

This is by no means a full list of agencies at all. There are many many more, these just happen to be ones that I personally looked into and have written about here.  

Coercive and Unethical Adoption Practices

If you have experienced an unethical forced adoption surrender or were lied to, tricked, deceived, or had broken promises made in order to get your child for adoption, please let me know! If you are an adoptive parent who has witness such wrong doings please share your experiences here. It is only when we work together to call attention to these truths and make the unethical agencies accountable can we really FIX ADOPTION!

 See more examples of what is wrong with the adoption industry here.

Most Recent Posts Demonstrating Current Unethical Adoption Practices in the USA

Between the Extremes; Complexity of a Birth Mother

Yes, it is complex being a birth mother. This one act involves a duality of polar opposites. How can I be a victim of an industry, yet I made a choice? How can I be selfless and selfish at the same time? How I can I be a survivor, yet completely broken? How can I do the unthinkable, and then manage to carry on? How could I have been so weak as to lose my child, to not fight for him, and then so strong as to breath into another day?

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Universal Motherhood

There is not a “birthmother” gene. There is not a nerve that is cut. There is not a build up around her heart. She will give birth like every other mother has before her and every mother after. The very act of giving birth creates a mother even if legal paperwork or extenuating circumstances leave her unable to parent. There are no lines separating us here, no boundaries, no differences in race, country, or in time. There are no lines, either, separating a “normal” birth process from one that ends up as an adoption. One cannot just turn off those bonding hormones no matter what legal paperwork might be later signed.

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Adoption Road Rage – Welcome to National Adoption Awareness Month 2016

Welcome to National Adoption Awareness Month.

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Family Preservation

By Mirah Riben If your neighbor lost his job a year after his wife died, and he had three small kids, would you “help” him by taking away his kids? If a family in your church or congregation’s house burnt down and they had no family to stay with, would you help them by adopting their infant child? Recently, Ronnie Stewart a Florida minister of the Refuge Church of New…

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A Mother’s Love: Creating Gracie’s Bill

By Mirah Riben A mother’s love, loss and determination has greatly impacted social awareness and created organizations such as MADD, founded by Cindy Lightner, and the well-known Amber Alert system, which Donna Norris created. The power of another mother’s love also created the Make a Wish Foundation. All of these women, and others such as the parents in Sandy Hook, turned the loss of their children into a passion-driven effort…

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