• A Must Read List for Adoption Truths

    • In many states across the USA including New York, Adoptee Rights bills are introduced to state legislators year after year. Due to lack of public support and misinformation based outdated beliefs about the adoption process, year after year, this bills fail to become laws.

    • I am a product of this experiment. I was born on December 24th, 1988 and I was soon transferred from one mother to another because my first mother, known throughout my life as my birth mother, wasn’t married to my birth father. She was 16 years old and still in high school.

    • I was 14 when I learned I was pregnant and my life changed forever. Once I’d gotten that fateful news, I tried to imagine what it would be like to have a baby; I wondered if I’d be able to finish school, would I be able to give my baby the life she deserved?

    • So How Do We Fix Adoption in the USA? Domestic Voluntary Infant Adoption is what we are discussing here. Women facing and unplanned pregnancy and “choose” adoption rather than parenting. If you aren’t aware of adoption facts, then you might not be aware of the need for reform.

    • There are some facts about adoption that, really, you cannot dispute unless you are just trying to purposely to stay ignorant regarding the facts of infant adoption in this country. Adoption is, in its perfect form, suppose to be about finding homes for children that need them, not about finding children for parents that want them.

    • What Happens to the Numbers of Adoptable Infants in the USA if We Compare to Australia? IF the USA had similar adoption practices to Australia and supported mothers, in the US we would have only 539 Voluntary Domestic Infant relinquishments annually give or take.

    • The relinquishment and subsequent adoption of my son was actually picture perfect. I am a perfect example of exactly what adoption is when it works just as it is suppose to.The adoption of my son was perfect, I did everything the “right” way and still; the adoption of my son caused unnecessary pain and was wrong. This is way I speak out against adoption today.

    • Adoption was almost more like a crack that happened in my soul. A crack that that I thought and was encouraged to believe that would be temporary or always below the surface. Over time, the rest of life worked it’s way in, like water in cement and caused the very foundation of myself to crumble.

    • When I relinquished Max, it was suppose to be something that affected ME. Like so many things in adoption, the professionals were wrong. The “gift of adoption” just keep on giving and giving.. the pain has a huge ripple effect that touches every aspect of a woman’s lives including ALL our children.

    • Secondary adoptee rejection is a very real reality in adoption reunions. We all have a different skill set and experiences to handle a reunion.There are many mothers who were simply told to “never speak of this again” and that has proven to be a real unhealthy bit of advice.

    • The simple fact is that it is less than 1% of all relinquishing mothers desire to never set eyes on their children again. So because these 1% mothers another 6 to 8 million people and their children and their children’s children get denied medical histories, get denied their identity, get denied their truth..

    • Most adoption agencies will offer free “birthmother” counseling as part of their adoption services. A true counselor is supposed to advocate for their client, not the organization for which they work. Often adoption counseling is “in agency” and therefore, not really nonpartisan. There is no guarantee that the “counselor” is neutral and actually has the expectant mothers’ best interests at heart.

    • I figured that I would write a post that makes it easier for women to become birthmothers. Hence, here’s a handy guide on how to become more appealing to adoption agencies and ways to ensure that you will place your baby.

About Claudia Corrigan D’Arcy

Professional Rabble Rouser and Online Activist

Claudia Corrigan D'Arcy Adoption ActivistClaudia Corrigan D’Arcy has been online and involved in the adoption community since early in 2001. She originally began independently researching adoption issues in preparation of the successful search and reunion with her own son, Max, whom was placed for adoption in 1987.

Growing Online as a Birthmother

From humble beginnings on the now defunct Adoption Cafe and MSN Group Adoption Message boards, her knowledge of adoption and the internet grew together. From forums, to blogs, to the rise in social networking, Claudia has continued to see the internet as a powerful tool that allows isolated communities to find each other and, most importantly, find their voices and be heard. She has become a forerunner in the use of social networking for the online adoption community.

Musings of the Lame has become a much needed road map for many mothers who relinquished, adoptees who long to be heard, and adoptive parents who seek understanding.

Adoption to Corporations and Back to Adoption Again

Professionally, her work with the adoption community lead her to a career as a corporate blogger and SEO copywriter. Her writings have been published under many pen names.

She is the former the Director of Social Media at DragonSearch, an internet marketing firm in the Hudson Valley. In July 2012, she left this position to focus full time on the needs of the adoption community and launch her own consulting business with Adopting Social. This life change allows her to practice what she preaches to her clients; follow your passions, be real, and you never know where you might end up.

Indeed, the internet has opened many new doors to adventures for Claudia, both privately and professionally. Hence, why the ROI of social media is not something that can be measured.

The Journey Cannot Be Measured

Since becoming active, Claudia also initiated a search for her son adopted at birth. She later found and contacted Max directly through MySpace in 2005, long before Facebook became the adoption search tool of choice. After almost 2 years of contact, they met for the first time in March ’07. All four of her children were reunited later the same year.

Besides here on Musings of the Lame, her writings on adoption issue have been published in The New York Times, BlogHer, Divine Caroline, Adoption Today Magazine, Adoption Constellation Magazine, Adopt-a-tude.com, Lost Mothers, Grown in my Heart, Adoption Voice Magazine, and many others. She is  a member of the Land of a Gazillion Adoptees team and serves on the board of directors of the Adoptee Rights Coalition.

She has been interviewed by Dan Rather, Montel Williams and appeared on Huffington Post regarding adoption as well as presented at various adoption conferences, other radio and print interviews over the years. Most recently, she authored a piece for The New York Times’s parenting blog, becoming the first birthmother published on the Motherlode.

She resides in New York’s Hudson Valley with her husband, Rye, children, and various pets.


 Read the latest posts from Claud below:

Emotional Unpacking; One Week After the American Adoption Congress Conference

So Much Adoption in Just Five San Francisco Days. After going to more than a few adoption conferences, it might seem silly to say that they are life changing events. I mean, really, how many times can one’s life really change? But I have to say, that I did walk away with one giant realization when I got home. read more…

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BAD BILL!! Louisiana Adoptee Rights Bill HB No. 1028; It’s Got to GO!

According to my source, Senator Daniel Martiny, who is a FRIEND of adoption and actually understands this issue, has said that if he gets calls, letters, and such OPPOSING bill #1028, then he will NOT pursue it for the Senate. So we need to contact Sen. Martiny TODAY and stop this bill. read more…

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The Adoption Culture in the UK – Are Things Better Across the Pond?

It must be said, that the biggest downfall in the American adoption system is the agencies that operate within it, a notion that any visitor to this site shall surely agree with. The fact that these are private organisations making a profit from the system commodifies human life. In Britain, then, there is no charge to use the services of an adoption agency, or to enlist one to help you through the adoption process. read more…

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Hope for Ethiopian Families; An Ethiopian Adoption Search Registry

Ethiopian Adoption Connection is a searchable database, the objective of which is to match Ethiopian adoptees living around the world with their families in Ethiopia. I’m really very proud of it. It’s clean and simple which was key. We had to anticipate language and cultural issues, plus privacy verses searchability. Check it out at http://ethiopianadoptionconnection.org/. read more…

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Missing Persons

What’s the Difference? Family of the Missing Plane or Mother from Adoption

I personally find it difficult to understand why our society in general can grasp these families grief, yet they can’t understand or even acknowledge a mother of adoption loss’ grief. Do mothers not warrant the same compassion and empathy as those that lose a loved one in another fashion? Loss is loss. Grief has no rules as to which situation grants the right to grieve. read more…

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Tragic Loss to the AdoptionLand Community; Jeni Flock – Adoptee and Beautiful Soul

With a broken and heavy heart we share the news of the unexpected passing of someone dear to so many of us. Jeni Gay Flock has passed on March 19, 2014. Fellow activist, adoptee, and beautiful soul, she will be missed. read more…

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FREE PARENT TRAINING: Living the Legacy; The Dramatic Effects of Prenatal Substance Exposure

WHEN: Wednesday, March 27, 20146:00 to 9:00 p.m.WHERE: Adoption Network Cleveland 4614 Prospect Ave, Ste 550 Cleveland, Ohio 44103
WHO: Foster, Adoptive or Birthparents
CONTACT: At least one week prior to date: Eddie Lebron at 216-881-5390 read more…

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WHEN: Friday, March 29, 2014 9:00 a.m. to 4:00 p.m.
WHERE: Adoption Network Cleveland 4614 Prospect Avenue, Ste 550 Cleveland, Ohio 44103
WHO: Adoptive, Foster or Birthparents read more…

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World Premier of “A Simple Piece of Paper” at Cleveland International Film Festival

Documentary film maker Jean A.S. Strauss will be in Cleveland for the viewing of her new film “A Simple Piece of Paper”. Adoption Network Cleveland is proud to be the Community Partner for the world premiere of this film. Jean follows 18 citizens as they receive their original birth certificates following a change in Illinois law. In 2015, Ohio Adoptees will be able to do the same. read more…

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LAKE COUNTY GENERAL SUPPORT & DISCUSSION: Panel, The Impact of Reunion on Our Families

WHEN: Tuesday, March 25, 2014 7:00 to 9:00 p.m.
WHERE: Mentor Baptist Church 7500 Johnnycake Ridge Mentor, Ohio
WHO: Anyone associated with adoption or foster children read more…

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Adoption Fundraisers, Church Tax Deductions, the Adoption Tax Credit and Fraud?

What I have discovered is that the huge amounts of money in adoption and specifically in adoption funding through church again, makes my jaw not just drop, but fall to the floor and go hide in a corner trembling. But it’s all ok, right? Because we are saving children from the horrible fate of living in apartments with their single mothers and having to go to day care. read more…

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WHEN: Monday, March 24, 2014 6:00 to 7:30 p.m.
WHERE: Adoption Network Cleveland 4614 Prospect Ave, Ste 550 Cleveland, Ohio 44103
WHO: Anyone interested in volunteering with ANC in any capacity. read more…

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Debunking OBC Access Myths and Fears; Abortion Rates Will Go Up

Have the abortion rates in those states gone up since OBC access was restored which would indicate that women fear this lack of mythological privacy in adoption? If a women knows that someday her relinquished child will be an adult and could access his or her original birth certificate with her name on it, will she abort the pregnancy rather than give birth? Abortions rates say NO! Adoptee Equality Proves to be NO Threat to Unborn Babies! read more…

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WHEN: Thursday, March 20, 2014 5:30 to 8:30 p.m.
WHERE: Church of the Savior 2537 Lee Road Cleveland Heights, Ohio 44118
WHO: Anyone interested in making a difference to a youth in foster care by becoming a Mentor
CONTACT: amy.lomis@adoptionnetwork.org
FEE: NONE read more…

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Cleveland Heights General Adoption Support & Discussion Meeting

When: Thursday, March 20, 2014 7:00 to 9:00 p.m.
Where: Church of the Savior 2537 Lee Road Cleveland Heights, Ohio 44118
Who: Anyone connected with adoption. read more…

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