• A Must Read List for Adoption Truths

    • In many states across the USA including New York, Adoptee Rights bills are introduced to state legislators year after year. Due to lack of public support and misinformation based outdated beliefs about the adoption process, year after year, this bills fail to become laws.

    • I am a product of this experiment. I was born on December 24th, 1988 and I was soon transferred from one mother to another because my first mother, known throughout my life as my birth mother, wasn’t married to my birth father. She was 16 years old and still in high school.

    • I was 14 when I learned I was pregnant and my life changed forever. Once I’d gotten that fateful news, I tried to imagine what it would be like to have a baby; I wondered if I’d be able to finish school, would I be able to give my baby the life she deserved?

    • So How Do We Fix Adoption in the USA? Domestic Voluntary Infant Adoption is what we are discussing here. Women facing and unplanned pregnancy and “choose” adoption rather than parenting. If you aren’t aware of adoption facts, then you might not be aware of the need for reform.

    • There are some facts about adoption that, really, you cannot dispute unless you are just trying to purposely to stay ignorant regarding the facts of infant adoption in this country. Adoption is, in its perfect form, suppose to be about finding homes for children that need them, not about finding children for parents that want them.

    • What Happens to the Numbers of Adoptable Infants in the USA if We Compare to Australia? IF the USA had similar adoption practices to Australia and supported mothers, in the US we would have only 539 Voluntary Domestic Infant relinquishments annually give or take.

    • The relinquishment and subsequent adoption of my son was actually picture perfect. I am a perfect example of exactly what adoption is when it works just as it is suppose to.The adoption of my son was perfect, I did everything the “right” way and still; the adoption of my son caused unnecessary pain and was wrong. This is way I speak out against adoption today.

    • Adoption was almost more like a crack that happened in my soul. A crack that that I thought and was encouraged to believe that would be temporary or always below the surface. Over time, the rest of life worked it’s way in, like water in cement and caused the very foundation of myself to crumble.

    • When I relinquished Max, it was suppose to be something that affected ME. Like so many things in adoption, the professionals were wrong. The “gift of adoption” just keep on giving and giving.. the pain has a huge ripple effect that touches every aspect of a woman’s lives including ALL our children.

    • Secondary adoptee rejection is a very real reality in adoption reunions. We all have a different skill set and experiences to handle a reunion.There are many mothers who were simply told to “never speak of this again” and that has proven to be a real unhealthy bit of advice.

    • The simple fact is that it is less than 1% of all relinquishing mothers desire to never set eyes on their children again. So because these 1% mothers another 6 to 8 million people and their children and their children’s children get denied medical histories, get denied their identity, get denied their truth..

    • Most adoption agencies will offer free “birthmother” counseling as part of their adoption services. A true counselor is supposed to advocate for their client, not the organization for which they work. Often adoption counseling is “in agency” and therefore, not really nonpartisan. There is no guarantee that the “counselor” is neutral and actually has the expectant mothers’ best interests at heart.

    • I figured that I would write a post that makes it easier for women to become birthmothers. Hence, here’s a handy guide on how to become more appealing to adoption agencies and ways to ensure that you will place your baby.

About Claudia Corrigan D’Arcy

Professional Rabble Rouser and Online Activist

Claudia Corrigan D'Arcy Adoption ActivistClaudia Corrigan D’Arcy has been online and involved in the adoption community since early in 2001. She originally began independently researching adoption issues in preparation of the successful search and reunion with her own son, Max, whom was placed for adoption in 1987.

Growing Online as a Birthmother

From humble beginnings on the now defunct Adoption Cafe and MSN Group Adoption Message boards, her knowledge of adoption and the internet grew together. From forums, to blogs, to the rise in social networking, Claudia has continued to see the internet as a powerful tool that allows isolated communities to find each other and, most importantly, find their voices and be heard. She has become a forerunner in the use of social networking for the online adoption community.

Musings of the Lame has become a much needed road map for many mothers who relinquished, adoptees who long to be heard, and adoptive parents who seek understanding.

Adoption to Corporations and Back to Adoption Again

Professionally, her work with the adoption community lead her to a career as a corporate blogger and SEO copywriter. Her writings have been published under many pen names.

She is the former the Director of Social Media at DragonSearch, an internet marketing firm in the Hudson Valley. In July 2012, she left this position to focus full time on the needs of the adoption community and launch her own consulting business with Adopting Social. This life change allows her to practice what she preaches to her clients; follow your passions, be real, and you never know where you might end up.

Indeed, the internet has opened many new doors to adventures for Claudia, both privately and professionally. Hence, why the ROI of social media is not something that can be measured.

The Journey Cannot Be Measured

Since becoming active, Claudia also initiated a search for her son adopted at birth. She later found and contacted Max directly through MySpace in 2005, long before Facebook became the adoption search tool of choice. After almost 2 years of contact, they met for the first time in March ’07. All four of her children were reunited later the same year.

Besides here on Musings of the Lame, her writings on adoption issue have been published in The New York Times, BlogHer, Divine Caroline, Adoption Today Magazine, Adoption Constellation Magazine, Adopt-a-tude.com, Lost Mothers, Grown in my Heart, Adoption Voice Magazine, and many others. She is  a member of the Land of a Gazillion Adoptees team and serves on the board of directors of the Adoptee Rights Coalition.

She has been interviewed by Dan Rather, Montel Williams and appeared on Huffington Post regarding adoption as well as presented at various adoption conferences, other radio and print interviews over the years. Most recently, she authored a piece for The New York Times’s parenting blog, becoming the first birthmother published on the Motherlode.

She resides in New York’s Hudson Valley with her husband, Rye, children, and various pets.

 

 Read the latest posts from Claud below:


865 Pages of Transcripts to Bring Camden Home!

The finial cost estimate for what is needed is 179, 317, and 379 pages at $5.50 a page. I’ll save you the math; it’s $4,700.00 and really should be ordered as soon as possible, like next week.
So, are we ready to make a miracle happen again? You help and support during this has been nothing short of amazing and only with YOU have we been able to keep this moving along. It’s not Adoption. It’s not Gentle. It’s not Care.
With your help, we can fight this and make it right. I know we can. I believe in us all. read more…

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Hey Media Folks- Anyone Want a REAL Story for National Adoption Month?

With National Adoption Month coming up in November, I am sure your publication is preparing heartwarming tales to highlight adoption. I would like to tell you about a story that doesn’t fall under the normal feel good, but is instead, a complete fallacy of everything we want to celebrate about adoption. It is a story about corrupting and the abuses of power. It is a story about a mother in crisis having that vulnerability exploited, trusting the wrong people and then fighting a system that wants to shut her down. The world needs to know about such injustices happening in the name of adoption. This is not adoption. It is the forcible separation of a family based on a wrongly interpreted law and repeated illegal acts. read more…

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Please Take the CUB “OPEN ADOPTION BETRAYAL” Survey

Fellow birth mother and researcher, Dr. Gail Hanssen Perry would like to know more about today’s betrayed open adoptions. She wants to compare today’s experiences with the findings of her doctoral research, “Extending Families: How Adoptive Parents Transition to Openness”, now 20 years old. This will not only enhances the CUB Retreat, but it could become part of a document CUB prepares to alert vulnerable pregnant couples to possible pitfalls. Gail and CUB Founder, Lee Campbell, have collaborated on a handout that includes a few questions for those who have been betrayed. I am happy to be able to make this into a online version for CUB and to help gather the information for them. If you are a Betrayed Birth Parent who was Promised More in Adoption than You Received, PLEASE Take the Survey! read more…

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Adoption Book Review: “Birth Mother” by Denise Emanuel Clemen

What I love the most about Denise Emanuel Clemen’s memoir “Birth Mother” is that it is ONLY the pregnancy and immediate adoption experience that she tells. Just as the reader has so many unanswered questions and wonders, the birthmother is left always wondering about her child and the child is left wondering about the mother. It is that complete separation that makes this story so powerful. read more…

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This is YOUR Appeal and I Thank You

And I am thrilled to say that Carri’s amazing legal team did indeed file the Notice of Appeal in Ohio’s tenth district Court of Appeals this morning.
The door to justice was about to lock shut and all of us, we threw our bodies into the that door and shoved out feet in that crack and now, that door shall remain open. read more…

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What Does Adoption By Gentle Care Have to Say About Caroline ( “Carri”) Stearns?

What Adoption by Gentle Care has to say, both publicly and privately, about Caroline ( “Carri”) Stearns. Notice how they refuse to say that Camden is still sitting in foster care with all their various lies and untruths. read more…

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Adoption by Gentle Care; An Adoption Agency in Ohio Not so Gentle, Not so Caring

I don’t need to tell you what to do. I don’t need to tell you to be outraged. I don’t need to tell you how to feel about this mother and baby boy. I just ask that you help me do something. He is only 3 weeks old. He doesn’t have to remembered this like Veronica Brown. read more…

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Updating on the Current UnEthical Adoption in Ohio

This CAN be over any minute. If the HAP’s returned Camden to Adoption by Gentle Care and aren’t willing to take the bullet; if the DNA results prove that they will fighting both an illegal consent of the mother and a refusal to consent from a father, then it just might be too much for these unethical characters. read more…

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The Crucifixion of Carri; How to Make her Less Than a Human Being Worthy of Compassion

I know how this story goes. Grayson Vaughn’s father Benjamin was a “criminal”, Dusten Brown was a “deadbeat dad” and I suppose Carri must require some sort of character assassination as well. read more…

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When Newborns are Shuffled Around in Legal Shell Games

And I am frustrated, now completely, in the manner that this moves along legally. When a newborns life and well being hangs in the balance, and his lifelong issues of trust and security are being compromised, this becomes a game of legal motions, petitions, actions, courts and stays. I swear there should be some kind of judicial rush that comes into play when a child’s life and well being hangs in balance. Yet, case after case, we watch as the games drag on, financials are drained and the child is the one used like a pawn of adults and agencies with their own agenda. Then the courts have the nerve to rule on a child’s best interest when they themselves had a hand in causing the pain and loss that will accompany almost any outcome. read more…

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And so it Begins: The Battle is On Over Baby Camden

Is THIS document the “training”? Well Kelli didn’t listen. Really? Sorry.. “stop the adoption”, we KNOW that to be 100% UNTRUE. See, if there was any truth to that then Kelli Shoemaker would have STOPPED the adoption. There were PLENTY of signs of duress that she missed. read more…

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Adoption by Gentle Care; Digging an Even Deeper Hole

Adoption by Gentle Care is back talking on Facebook. How are they controlling the message and maybe not look like a really unethical and non caring adoption agency? It seems like the course in online reputation management that they took advised AGC to some highly “black hat” ( that’s “unethical” in SEO terms) techniques. I thought it might be fun to take some time out and look into what we can SEE Adoption by Gentle Care doing right now on the public forums. read more…

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No Justice Today for Baby Camden

I am very saddened to have to say that this afternoon, the judge granted Adoption by Gentle Care’s motion to dismiss the Writ of Habeas Corpus in the Ohio Juvenile Court.
In other words, we lost in court.
Today we hurt. The message that this Ohio court has sent to the adoption industry is very clear. Adoption Agencies can do whatever they want in order to procure babies for adoption. Adoption Agencies do not need to follow laws. Adoption Agencies are not held accountable. It’s really a complete no man’s land when it comes to the regulation and accountability of adoption. There is no justice. read more…

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Logo Contest & Call for Proposals AAC 2015 Annual Conference MAR 25 – 29, 2015

Join the AAC and AdoptionLand Community in Cambridge, MA in March of 2105 for Educate, Advocate, Legislate! Calls for presentation proposals and a conference logo contest are now open! read more…

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Adoptee Film “You Have His Eyes” Screening at Kingston Film Festival

WHEN: August 16 2014 at 3:00 pm
WHERE: BSP 323 Wall Street, Kingston, 12401 http://www.bspkingston.com
WHAT: Screening of “You Have His Eyes” read more…

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