Long and hard about what is most important for them to know and understand about the adoption of Max. So I came up with this: The need to know that I see it as a huge mistake. That we don’t just, with ease. walk away from our kids. That I cannot just walk away from them. Big, big deal for me The reasoning behind it. Yeah, maybe they won’t get…
Once there was a girl who was not quite a grown up yet. She came to realize that she had a baby growing in her belly. And that made her very scared. So she kept it a secret for a long time. She was afraid of what would happen when she had the baby and she became a mommy. She wasn’t sure that she knew how to be a mommy…
So, one of the things that I need to do before Max actually gets here for his first visit is tell Scarlett and Tristan. I haven;t told them before..well, because it seems cruel in a way. Right now they don’t know they have a bigger than Garin, older brother..so they do not know they have a loss. They cannot miss what they don’t know they have. Plus even though I…
How can I avoid the ever growing laundry pile..let me count the ways. 1) Post a new bold tread about nothing….yeah, that will work! So…I have an awful headache right now. I do believe we call it a hangover. It’s not my fault, really!. I wanted to go to bed early last night! But life happened. My car is in the shop. Had to go in to fix a ton…
Since you seem intent on dicussing Max, I thought I would give you a whole post to yourself. So on a post that really had nothing to directly do with Max and his upcoing visit, you found the need to say: Max landed in just the family he was meant to land in. No mistakes were made. You were the vessel through which he sailed to find where he belonged….
In the course of being “active” with adoption online, I frequently come in contact with pregnant women who are thinking about placing. OK, I’ll admit it..I ( used to ) seek them out and look for them. I do feel the responsibility to give them insights to the big picture, long term ramifications, all the stuff that would really fall under “informed consent” but that we can trust the agencies…
I am really annoyed with my mother in law. It has been kinda building up for a few months. I don’t hold a grudge, but tend to try to overlook things that bother me often, for the sake of peace. But I am at that enough is enough point. She was watching the beasts for me Saturday night while both Rye and I worked. Nprmally, I don’t work on Saturdays,…
I just hopped over to my mailbox and had a message alert fom my Max..so I am all happy..yeah..and then I read it. I am sitting here..shaking in my skin..crying..HE WANTS TO COME AND VISIT!!!!! My Baby..he’s gonna come see me!!! He will get to met his brothers ans sister and me and be here!!! HE’S COMING HOME!!!! God I love this guy!! I just have to share how amazing…
Funny how sometimes I don’t see how much all this thinking about stuff has really changed me..and then I do see it..and it is rather amazing. Why Are People So Afraid of Anger? I work with a young woman who has had a pretty rough road in life. I find her amazing and the word strong is definitely applicable. Her parents and her childhood are way less than perfect. That’s her…
The doorbell just rang and I know it was the UPS man. I was very bad..in a good way..and ordered something 170 dollars worth of books from Amazon. It was Garin;s fault really..he wanted some Ska DVD, but since I HAD to place an order…. I got Adoption Nation for 57cents!! Which is great because I need to read it with my highlighter so I can really know my stuff…
I gave Mauela big fat gold stars yesterday for taking on this post. Which brings me to here and then the need to continue with not true, but true horror stories of adoptions that should not be. Because it was said so well I want to quote her devineness here: “It is unacceptable to me that this type of unseemly adoption takes place at ALL. Although this is an exaggerated…
I would love to see a real deep physiological study done on the growing up, formative years of women who “choose” to become mothers of loss. My guess is that we were not loved unconditionally by mothers with issues who tended to be narcissistic I think our fathers might be either absent or didn’t stand up to our mothers rule. And maybe that could also be reversed too? I wonder if we ever felt worthy of anything, so how could we be worthy of our children?
It’s a hard battle to feel I am suppose to have anything I want and keep it. Sometimes I don’t feel I deserve it at all. And then, part of me screams how much I should have and I am entitled. But I still am afraid of the loss again.
Can’t say that I keep secrects; Here’s the story of how I was arrested for grand larceny! Never mind that Williams Lumber made 13K off that would not be in their pocket at all if I had not worked 70 plus hours a week for almost 3 months without any other compensation by them. They fired me, had me arrested and black balled my name.
So Scarlett’s birthday is tomorrow. I went out today..nothing like the last minute momma, and bought her a bicycle. I hadn’t really intended to buy her a bike, but it turns out it is a good thing. I was thinking a new play kitchen as we ditched the defunct Barbie kitchen to the front porch where maybe some Sunday someone besides me might actually bring ot out to the curb,…
She cleaned a mean house and laundry got done on schedule. And oh, could that woman shop!!! Shopping with my mother was a religious experience. Macy’s with my Mom on their “One Day Sales”…we would run to the register laden with bargains. The cashier’s worst nightmare.