Musings of the Lame; An Adoption Blog


Between the Extremes; Complexity of a Birth Mother

Yes, it is complex being a birth mother. This one act involves a duality of polar opposites. How can I be a victim of an industry, yet I made a choice? How can I be selfless and selfish at the same time? How I can I be a survivor, yet completely broken? How can I do the unthinkable, and then manage to carry on? How could I have been so weak as to lose my child, to not fight for him, and then so strong as to breath into another day?


Universal Motherhood

There is not a “birthmother” gene. There is not a nerve that is cut. There is not a build up around her heart. She will give birth like every other mother has before her and every mother after. The very act of giving birth creates a mother even if legal paperwork or extenuating circumstances leave her unable to parent. There are no lines separating us here, no boundaries, no differences in race, country, or in time. There are no lines, either, separating a “normal” birth process from one that ends up as an adoption. One cannot just turn off those bonding hormones no matter what legal paperwork might be later signed.


(Birth) Moms ~ Search for Your (adult) Child!

By Susie from: Wild Women Sisterhood FULL MOON PRAYER by Rumi What in your life is Calling you, When all the noise is silenced, The meetings adjourned.. The lists laid aside, And the Wild Iris blooms By itself In the dark forest… What still pulls on your Soul? Are you a mother who lost a child to adoption? Does your (now adult) child call out to your soul? Are you…



Letter to Indiana Legislators in Support of SB91

By Laura Marie Scoggins I am writing to encourage your support of Senate Bill 91 which will allow ALL Hoosier Adoptees equal access to their original birth certificates. Pre 1994 adoptees deserve the same access as post 1994 adoptees. One of the most common questions adoptees are asked when they tell people they are searching for their biological family or have been reunited is “why would you even want to…