• A Must Read List for Adoption Truths

    • In many states across the USA including New York, Adoptee Rights bills are introduced to state legislators year after year. Due to lack of public support and misinformation based outdated beliefs about the adoption process, year after year, this bills fail to become laws.

    • I am a product of this experiment. I was born on December 24th, 1988 and I was soon transferred from one mother to another because my first mother, known throughout my life as my birth mother, wasn’t married to my birth father. She was 16 years old and still in high school.

    • I was 14 when I learned I was pregnant and my life changed forever. Once I’d gotten that fateful news, I tried to imagine what it would be like to have a baby; I wondered if I’d be able to finish school, would I be able to give my baby the life she deserved?

    • So How Do We Fix Adoption in the USA? Domestic Voluntary Infant Adoption is what we are discussing here. Women facing and unplanned pregnancy and “choose” adoption rather than parenting. If you aren’t aware of adoption facts, then you might not be aware of the need for reform.

    • There are some facts about adoption that, really, you cannot dispute unless you are just trying to purposely to stay ignorant regarding the facts of infant adoption in this country. Adoption is, in its perfect form, suppose to be about finding homes for children that need them, not about finding children for parents that want them.

    • What Happens to the Numbers of Adoptable Infants in the USA if We Compare to Australia? IF the USA had similar adoption practices to Australia and supported mothers, in the US we would have only 539 Voluntary Domestic Infant relinquishments annually give or take.

    • The relinquishment and subsequent adoption of my son was actually picture perfect. I am a perfect example of exactly what adoption is when it works just as it is suppose to.The adoption of my son was perfect, I did everything the “right” way and still; the adoption of my son caused unnecessary pain and was wrong. This is way I speak out against adoption today.

    • Adoption was almost more like a crack that happened in my soul. A crack that that I thought and was encouraged to believe that would be temporary or always below the surface. Over time, the rest of life worked it’s way in, like water in cement and caused the very foundation of myself to crumble.

    • When I relinquished Max, it was suppose to be something that affected ME. Like so many things in adoption, the professionals were wrong. The “gift of adoption” just keep on giving and giving.. the pain has a huge ripple effect that touches every aspect of a woman’s lives including ALL our children.

    • Secondary adoptee rejection is a very real reality in adoption reunions. We all have a different skill set and experiences to handle a reunion.There are many mothers who were simply told to “never speak of this again” and that has proven to be a real unhealthy bit of advice.

    • The simple fact is that it is less than 1% of all relinquishing mothers desire to never set eyes on their children again. So because these 1% mothers another 6 to 8 million people and their children and their children’s children get denied medical histories, get denied their identity, get denied their truth..

    • Most adoption agencies will offer free “birthmother” counseling as part of their adoption services. A true counselor is supposed to advocate for their client, not the organization for which they work. Often adoption counseling is “in agency” and therefore, not really nonpartisan. There is no guarantee that the “counselor” is neutral and actually has the expectant mothers’ best interests at heart.

    • I figured that I would write a post that makes it easier for women to become birthmothers. Hence, here’s a handy guide on how to become more appealing to adoption agencies and ways to ensure that you will place your baby.

Welcome to the Hudson Valley Adoption Support Group

Peer to Peer Support Group for Adult Adoptees, Birth Mothers & Families

www.HudsonValleyAdoptionSupport.comAre you a local Hudson valley Adult Adoptee wondering how to start an adoption search? Have you hit a snag regarding New York States sealed original birth certificate laws? Are you a birthmother wondering about your relinquished child? Or maybe a birth father or sibling trying to navigate a post adoption reunion relationship? Or how about just being able to sit with a group of people who understand exactly what you mean without having to go into details or make disclaimers.

This is why we need a local face to face adoption support group in the Hudson Valley!

Adoption Can Be Very Isolating

Before the internet I lived over 14 years without having known that I had ever spoken to another women who had also relinquished a child to adoption. The first thing I ever Googled was “adoption”. Since becoming involved in the online adoption support community, I have had the opportunity to met many more birthmothers and adoptees who also live in the local Hudson Valley area. As I say, I tend to collect adoptees and birth families.

The problem is, many people as me for advice or for local post adoption support, and we really do not have too many services for adult adoptees and birth parents in the area.  While there is more collective education for adoptive parents, the closest peer support for adult adoptees and mothers who relinquished is Westchester, Albany and New York City. It’s just a simple fact that needs to change and so therefore, I say,  let’s change that.

Provide Adoption Support and Understanding Among Ourselves

By basing our local Hudson Valley Adoption Support group off of well established and successful  self run groups, we keep it simple and can easily provide acknowledgment, acceptance and understanding for others adoption affected.  Like RIARG and Genesee Valley, we meet monthly at a relaxed local establishment  to talk adoption. Topics can range from search advice, to emotional implications, reunion, understanding the impacts of adoption, and everything in between.  Basically, the group will exist to govern itself and provide what the group itself needs.

Magic Happens when Adoption Folks Come Together

I can tell you this; if you are at all affected by adoption and you never thought to attend a function with  an adoption specific  group of people, then you are doing yourself a disservice. I now it can feel scary or even like admitting that something that you don’t want to affect your life, is actually causing an action, but for so many, it is like coming home.  The people I have met during my personal adoption journey have been some of the greatest folks I have ever had the pleasure to met.  And then, there is the ability to talk freely among ourselves; to not have to explain everything, to add disclaimers, to fend off uneducated comments. Plus, the amazing knowledge that you are not alone in your feelings; that you are normal and other people feel the same way.

I personally won’t pretend to have all the answers but I sure can organize and produce a safe place for people to come together with questions for understanding and support. Please join us!

Meet Other Local Hudson Valley Folks with a Common Bond

We meet once a month in a central area that works for all attending. It’s really simple to get started; just fill out the form for the mailing list attached to the link below. The information you choose to share shall never be released anywhere for any reason ever. It is exclusively for the purposes of understanding how this group can benefit you the most. Fill in as much as you want in the ways it best makes sense for your personal experience. The check boxes allow multiply options for situations where an adoptee is also a birth parents or you are in reunion with one parent or child, but searching for another, etc.

Join the Hudson Valley Adoption Support Group NOW; click here!

Meeting Date: Thursday May 23, 2013; 7:00 pm; location to be announced.

For more information and questions; contact Claud.

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