Before Making an Adoption Plan

before making an adoption planIf you are facing an unplanned pregnancy and are considering giving the baby up for adoption, there are many things you should know before making an adoption plan.

In fact, there are many things that you should know about the process of adoption before you make any contact at all with a infant domestic adoption agency.

  • Even if you think it would be a good idea to make a few inquiries and get some information about their newborn adoption programs, please STOP TALKING TO THE ADOPTION AGENCIES and READ.
  • If you are already in contact with an adoption agency and talking to them about giving up your child for adoption; please STOP TALKING TO YOUR ADOPTION SOCIAL WORKER, no matter how much you like her, and READ.
  • If you have already “chosen” adoption and are worried about finding the perfect set of parents,; please STOP LOOKING AT ADOPTION SITUATIONS AND DEAR BIRTHMOTHER LETTERS ONLINE and READ.
  • If you are already matched with a lovely pre adoptive couple and have plans to pick out a changing table next week, please STOP THINKING ABOUT HOW HAPPY YOU ARE GOING TO MAKE THEM  and READ really really fast.

Or watch this three minute video real quick and THEN READ!

After It’s Too Late in the Adoption Process

If you have already relinquished your rights to your child and think it’s the greatest thing since sliced bread, please don’t waste your time telling me that I am crazy and have no idea what I am talking about. Come back and see me in five or ten years.

If you have lost your child to adoption and realize that this post relinquishment life is not panning out exactly as the adoption agency told you it would, or are wondering why you still feel this way, or suddenly feel like you’re going to lose it, then Welcome Home.

 Read more about what every Adoption Agency does NOT want you to know!!

Most Recent Adoption Blog Posts Talking about all the things other Birth Mothers learned after it was too late:

If I Knew Then…

By Susie More thoughts from the American Adoption Congress Conference: After I had agreed with Suz to participate in her “Mitigating and Managing Collateral Damage: Impact of Adoption on the 1st Family” presentation, I thought of many examples of the collateral damage in my life. When it came to the “managing and mitigating” part, the only thing I could come up with was to not lose a child to adoption…

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The Trauma of Mothers Who Have Lost Children to Adoption

By Mirah Riben In a public hearing before the Assembly Institutions, Health and Welfare Committee on Adoption, December 9, 1981, in Trenton, New Jersey, attorney Harold Cassidy made the following impassioned plea: There is a need for us in society to learn to know the women who have come to call themselves ‘birth-mothers.’ They are women who know that a child is part of his mother forever… They know the…

Posted in Before Making an Adoption Plan, Cultural Views on Adoption, Mirah Riben on Huffington Post, More Adoption Blogs from Adoption Bloggers, Relinquishment | 1 Comment

25 Open Adoption Questions to Consider

What should I consider before agreeing to enter into an open adoption?

The following questions are by no means exhaustive. In fact these are just a few considerations that might lead to a deeper evaluation of both the practical and philosophical ideas of how the biological family, adoptive family and the adoptee may be impacted by an open adoption.

This is not a “pro-adoption” post. Open adoption is highlighted by many adoption agencies and used as a coercive tool. It is often shown in a manner that evokes imagery of play dates in the park without addressing the concerns that will eventually arise. This list of questions is intended move beyond a surface understanding and provide a deeper understanding of possible difficulties.

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Birthing, Labor, and Adoption Relinquishment

Your adoption plan is what you think you want and how you hope it will go down, but you want it to be like right now doesn’t matter either because like labor, you really won’t be in control once you sign the relinquishment consent. That signature gives up ALL control.
I can tell you that the pain from labor fades. I cannot say the same about adoption.

Posted in Adoption Questions and Facts, Before Making an Adoption Plan, Relinquishment | Tagged , , , , | 3 Comments

New Jersey’s Golden Cradle Adoption Inc; More Unethical Adoption Agency Hyjinks 

Met Ana; she was told that she had the 30 day revocation timeframe under PA law because she is from PA, she lives in PA, she was told the family lived in PA, and the baby was born in PA, only to now be told that it’s a New Jersey adoption. Of course, New Jersey does not have a revocation of adoption consent period recognized by law. How convenient.

Posted in Adoption News, Adoption Truth, Before Making an Adoption Plan, Relinquishment, The Adoption Industry | Tagged | 1 Comment