• A Must Read List for Adoption Truths

    • In many states across the USA including New York, Adoptee Rights bills are introduced to state legislators year after year. Due to lack of public support and misinformation based outdated beliefs about the adoption process, year after year, this bills fail to become laws.

    • I am a product of this experiment. I was born on December 24th, 1988 and I was soon transferred from one mother to another because my first mother, known throughout my life as my birth mother, wasn’t married to my birth father. She was 16 years old and still in high school.

    • I was 14 when I learned I was pregnant and my life changed forever. Once I’d gotten that fateful news, I tried to imagine what it would be like to have a baby; I wondered if I’d be able to finish school, would I be able to give my baby the life she deserved?

    • So How Do We Fix Adoption in the USA? Domestic Voluntary Infant Adoption is what we are discussing here. Women facing and unplanned pregnancy and “choose” adoption rather than parenting. If you aren’t aware of adoption facts, then you might not be aware of the need for reform.

    • There are some facts about adoption that, really, you cannot dispute unless you are just trying to purposely to stay ignorant regarding the facts of infant adoption in this country. Adoption is, in its perfect form, suppose to be about finding homes for children that need them, not about finding children for parents that want them.

    • What Happens to the Numbers of Adoptable Infants in the USA if We Compare to Australia? IF the USA had similar adoption practices to Australia and supported mothers, in the US we would have only 539 Voluntary Domestic Infant relinquishments annually give or take.

    • The relinquishment and subsequent adoption of my son was actually picture perfect. I am a perfect example of exactly what adoption is when it works just as it is suppose to.The adoption of my son was perfect, I did everything the “right” way and still; the adoption of my son caused unnecessary pain and was wrong. This is way I speak out against adoption today.

    • Adoption was almost more like a crack that happened in my soul. A crack that that I thought and was encouraged to believe that would be temporary or always below the surface. Over time, the rest of life worked it’s way in, like water in cement and caused the very foundation of myself to crumble.

    • When I relinquished Max, it was suppose to be something that affected ME. Like so many things in adoption, the professionals were wrong. The “gift of adoption” just keep on giving and giving.. the pain has a huge ripple effect that touches every aspect of a woman’s lives including ALL our children.

    • Secondary adoptee rejection is a very real reality in adoption reunions. We all have a different skill set and experiences to handle a reunion.There are many mothers who were simply told to “never speak of this again” and that has proven to be a real unhealthy bit of advice.

    • The simple fact is that it is less than 1% of all relinquishing mothers desire to never set eyes on their children again. So because these 1% mothers another 6 to 8 million people and their children and their children’s children get denied medical histories, get denied their identity, get denied their truth..

    • Most adoption agencies will offer free “birthmother” counseling as part of their adoption services. A true counselor is supposed to advocate for their client, not the organization for which they work. Often adoption counseling is “in agency” and therefore, not really nonpartisan. There is no guarantee that the “counselor” is neutral and actually has the expectant mothers’ best interests at heart.

    • I figured that I would write a post that makes it easier for women to become birthmothers. Hence, here’s a handy guide on how to become more appealing to adoption agencies and ways to ensure that you will place your baby.

NJ Adoptee Rights Activists On the Campaign Trail with Gov. Christie

Election Lip Service or Veto Regret?

New Jersey’s Governor Chris  Christie stabbed Adoptee Rights advocates in the back (and the front and the head and the heart!) when he veto’s the Adoptee Rights bill in 2011. The bill which had finally passed the NJ House and the NJ Senate had been introduced many times over the last 30 years.

Yeah, you read that right. It took them 30 YEARS to get it through the House and Senate and then Christie went and vetoed it.  It pretty much made him one of the most hated people by the adoption affected on the east coast!

But, you just GOT to love our New Jersey peeps. And I though New Yorkers were stubborn? They just keep on keeping on. Seriously, NJCare has been at this so long, they really do have the whole Adoptee Rights thing covered.

Pressure on Christie’s Campaign Trail

This is one way that we can get our voices heard. Take the mountain to Mohammed!  Fellow mom advocate, ,Martha Gelarden, shown here talk directly to Gov. Christie while holding an adoptee rights sign. Christie said to put the bills through again.

NJ Adoptee Rights talk to Gov. Christie

The same statement was heard by Christie the next day when he spoke to AWOL founder, Peter Franklin. He even signed Peter’s shirt! May this picture not lie!!

Christie Signs NJ Adoptee Rights SHIRT!

Of course, Gov Christie is up for re-election and might tell anyone, even adoptees, what they want to hear. The question should be why did Christie veto the bill to begin with?

NJ is Sealed to Protect the Catholic Church!

All he had to do was sign his name and the 30 plus year old fight for adoptees civil rights in New Jersey would have ended.  Yet, Christie did not sign his name. Why? Because rumor has it that the Roman Catholic Arch Bishop called him up and the phone and told Governor Christie to be a good Catholic and veto that bill.
Or as the new sources claim:

On June 15, Newark Archbishop John J. Meyers, who is president of the Catholic Conference of bishops, wrote Christie asking he conditionally veto the bill. “A mother’s expressed request for privacy should be honored,” according to Myers’ letter. “Reunions between adoptees and birth parents should only be after mutual consent.”

Christie’s veto appears to support the arguments made by opponents — including New Jersey Rights to Life, New Jersey Catholic Conference and the New Jersey chapter of the American Civil Liberties Union — that women who placed children for adoption long ago were promised anonymity by Catholic adoption agencies.

What is the Catholic Church Hiding in the Name of “Birthmother Privacy”?

So aside from the fact that we know “Birthmother privacy” is some serious red herring type smoke screens  created to keep adoption records sealed, one might wonder why New Jersey adoption records are so special that they might warrant extra attention from the Catholic Church?

Could it be that New Jersey often shows up in some very shady adoption pipelines like the Kurtz baby brokers network? Or perhaps the weird adoption pipeline between NJ and Florida that sends newborns to Ireland  for adoption for the USA??? Or perhaps it is not just generic “birthmother” privacy but a “special” group of birthmothers who need special privacy??

Is Gov Christie hiding the Catholic Churches secrets?Like maybe it is true that there was a maternity home for pregnant nuns that was run in Cape May New Jersey? Maybe the Catholic Church sent the all knocked up nuns from all over the country to this special Cape May Catholic Nun Maternity home? Maybe the BIG secret is that if they open up adult adoptees access to their original birth certificates in New Jersey and these relentless NJ bastards search for their mothers, a bunch of them might find that their natural mothers had sworn to be the virgin brides of our Lord and God.

Can the Catholic Church Survive a Knocked Up Nun Adoption Scandal?

You would think that after the pedophile priests that the Church has learned a few lessons, but no.. still seems like hiding the truth is their way of dealing with past mistakes.  Not that I see a pregnant nun as a huge issue, it’s the fact that the pregnant nuns were probably forced to relinquish their children and then shamed into never speaking about it again that would be the major cruelty in my book.  Oh and then making a whole state full of adoptees suffer to hid their ways! Yeah, nothing like adding insult to injury!

So a Catholic retreat center that is already set up to be a place where nuns can come and go, way far off the beaten path at the tip of Cape May point would be a very good way to hide the sins of carnal knowledge. Granted no matter how far I dig, I find much more about the nuns of St Mary By the Sea battling the severe storms and their loss of their sand dunes, rather than the loss of their children to adoption. It seems that no one is talking and the church is busy covering their tracks.

I wonder if Christie will continue to do the Catholic Church’s dirty work or if his pre-election day words can be taken to heart by the New Jersey Adoptee Rights Advocates that have struggled for far to long.

If anyone comes up with anything more concrete regarding the Cap May Catholic Nun Maternity Home; please share!

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Claudia Corrigan DArcy

About Claudia Corrigan DArcy

Claudia Corrigan D’Arcy has been online and involved in the adoption community since early in 2001. Blogging since 2005, her website Musings of the Lame has become a much needed road map for many mothers who relinquished, adoptees who long to be heard, and adoptive parents who seek understanding. She is also an activist and avid supporter of Adoptee Rights and fights for nationwide birth certificate access for all adoptees with the Adoptee Rights Coalition. Besides here on Musings of the Lame, her writings on adoption issue have been published in The New York Times, BlogHer, Divine Caroline, Adoption Today Magazine, Adoption Constellation Magazine, Adopt-a-tude.com, Lost Mothers, Grown in my Heart, Adoption Voice Magazine, and many others. She has been interviewed by Dan Rather, Montel Williams and appeared on Huffington Post regarding adoption as well as presented at various adoption conferences, other radio and print interviews over the years. She resides in New York’s Hudson Valley with her husband, Rye, children, and various pets.
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3 Responses to NJ Adoptee Rights Activists On the Campaign Trail with Gov. Christie

  1. Where the babies came from shouldn’t change the fact that the mothers gave them up on the condition of anonymity. If they decide they want to reverse their agreement, that should be up to them.
    I don’t understand the outrage about them being nuns – we are all human and make our choices, and it is old news, as far as scandal.
    The real issue of concern is if there was any pressure or illegal actions practiced on the nuns. And that is a whole different arena.

  2. The article in question says that the mothers were promised anonymity by the catholic adoption agencies.
    (Actually, that does not say that the Church was the agency/handler of agreements and adoptions).

    There are a lot of questions and speculations about what MIGHT HAVE happened in those days, but no evidence.

    The info has to have been sealed, if people now want it unsealed – so somehow the anonymity was given.

    As I said, I am concerned about anything wrong/illegal that was done to the nuns and the babies.

    You seem to have an emotional issue with the church. According to the article, a catholic wrote to a catholic about an opinion. I did not see any coercion or threat in that note, and the intrigue about the ArchBishop, is mentioned as a rumor. The way the piece is written makes it very easy for an unsuspecting reader to take charges as fact, when there is actually no proof.

    If you are a Catholic, (even a christian), you are not to gossip. You are to love your enemies, and do good for those who harm you. Your behavior is a bad image for Catholics/Christians.

    I empathize with your personal dilemma. I suggest you need to behave in a way that gets you the results you want.

    Instead of making assumptions and spreading rumors, please do your research, document the accuracy, and work with the person who is most able to grant you what you seek. Pope Francis seems like someone who isn’t interested in deception, at least as far as his public speaking attests, so how about not expecting disappointment, but conduct yourself under the authority that truth provides, and don’t imagine resistance until it actually confronts you.

    Thanks for your attention. My initial comment was based only on what was presented, not on any of the links you subsequently provided. I really do wish you peace and success.

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