• A Must Read List for Adoption Truths

    • In many states across the USA including New York, Adoptee Rights bills are introduced to state legislators year after year. Due to lack of public support and misinformation based outdated beliefs about the adoption process, year after year, this bills fail to become laws.

    • I am a product of this experiment. I was born on December 24th, 1988 and I was soon transferred from one mother to another because my first mother, known throughout my life as my birth mother, wasn’t married to my birth father. She was 16 years old and still in high school.

    • I was 14 when I learned I was pregnant and my life changed forever. Once I’d gotten that fateful news, I tried to imagine what it would be like to have a baby; I wondered if I’d be able to finish school, would I be able to give my baby the life she deserved?

    • So How Do We Fix Adoption in the USA? Domestic Voluntary Infant Adoption is what we are discussing here. Women facing and unplanned pregnancy and “choose” adoption rather than parenting. If you aren’t aware of adoption facts, then you might not be aware of the need for reform.

    • There are some facts about adoption that, really, you cannot dispute unless you are just trying to purposely to stay ignorant regarding the facts of infant adoption in this country. Adoption is, in its perfect form, suppose to be about finding homes for children that need them, not about finding children for parents that want them.

    • What Happens to the Numbers of Adoptable Infants in the USA if We Compare to Australia? IF the USA had similar adoption practices to Australia and supported mothers, in the US we would have only 539 Voluntary Domestic Infant relinquishments annually give or take.

    • The relinquishment and subsequent adoption of my son was actually picture perfect. I am a perfect example of exactly what adoption is when it works just as it is suppose to.The adoption of my son was perfect, I did everything the “right” way and still; the adoption of my son caused unnecessary pain and was wrong. This is way I speak out against adoption today.

    • Adoption was almost more like a crack that happened in my soul. A crack that that I thought and was encouraged to believe that would be temporary or always below the surface. Over time, the rest of life worked it’s way in, like water in cement and caused the very foundation of myself to crumble.

    • When I relinquished Max, it was suppose to be something that affected ME. Like so many things in adoption, the professionals were wrong. The “gift of adoption” just keep on giving and giving.. the pain has a huge ripple effect that touches every aspect of a woman’s lives including ALL our children.

    • Secondary adoptee rejection is a very real reality in adoption reunions. We all have a different skill set and experiences to handle a reunion.There are many mothers who were simply told to “never speak of this again” and that has proven to be a real unhealthy bit of advice.

    • The simple fact is that it is less than 1% of all relinquishing mothers desire to never set eyes on their children again. So because these 1% mothers another 6 to 8 million people and their children and their children’s children get denied medical histories, get denied their identity, get denied their truth..

    • Most adoption agencies will offer free “birthmother” counseling as part of their adoption services. A true counselor is supposed to advocate for their client, not the organization for which they work. Often adoption counseling is “in agency” and therefore, not really nonpartisan. There is no guarantee that the “counselor” is neutral and actually has the expectant mothers’ best interests at heart.

    • I figured that I would write a post that makes it easier for women to become birthmothers. Hence, here’s a handy guide on how to become more appealing to adoption agencies and ways to ensure that you will place your baby.

NEWFLASH: Santa Claus is an Adoptee

Santa has a Birthmother; The Kringle Elves Didn’t Have a Home Study.

Trippy 1970s kids shows on acidSanta Claud is Coming to Town” has always been my favorite Christmas story. I think I was partial to Jessica being a pretty Rankin-Bass creation with her trippy cartoonish solo, plus I liked the way they told the story of Santa Claus and explained how it all happened.

Ye Olde St. Nick was a Foundling!

In case your childhood memories are lost or you had a deprived childhood with no TV, I will refresh your memory with this nice beginning synopsis from Wiki:

The story begins in the gloomy hamlet of Sombertown, which is ruled by the ill-tempered Burgermeister Meisterburger . A baby arrives on his doorstep, with a name tag reading “Claus” and note requesting that the Burgermeister raise the child as his own, despite the Burgermeister’s objections. He then orders his right-hand man and lawkeeper Grimsley to take the baby to the “Orphan Asylum”. On the way there, a gust of wind blows both sled and baby far away, to the mountain of the Whispering Winds. There, the animals hide him from the Winter Warlock  a powerful wizard who dislikes anyone trespassing his land. The animals then bring the baby to the other side of the mountain to an elf family by the name of Kringle. Led by Tanta Kringle the elf queen, they adopt the baby and name him “Kris”.

Yes, in case you have not thought about the innocence of a Christmas special in terms of adoption; Santa was a foundling and was adopted by the elves. Wiki said it. Rankin-Bass said it. I said it. It’s true. FACT!

Santa Claus Had a BirthMother

Now we don’t know what the circumstances that lead to Santa’s relinquishment were. We can assume that since this happened in the past, that there were the not the stringent legal fail checks around relinquishment.. Oh wait. Silly me! There ARE NOT stringent legal fail safes surrounding  adoption! Ho Ho Ho!

Anyway, one might guess that Santa Claus’ Birthmother was feeling the ill effects of economic downturn in the Sombertown under the Burgermeister Meisterburger’s rule. Kris Kringle ( his adopted name) didn’t seem to be a “newborn” though aging the Rankin-Bass claymation figures is kind of hard. It’s not like we can check their teeth. Anyway, we can guess that Santa’s birthmother tried to raise her baby for a bit of time before surrendering;  if nothing else because a newborn would NOT survive long enough for the social workers forest animals to deliver the baby to the elves in THAT weather!

It seems that Santa’ Claus’ birthmother, like many birthmothers, she went for what she perceived as “better”, leaving the child originally on the Burgermeister Meisterburger’s front steps. No home study there and we hope he would not have passed the psychological components as he was holding on to just a little bit of anger. Alas, Santa’s’ original mother must have overlooked that  and was blinded by  his obvious wealth, power or biggest house in town… or she was just not given enough information to make an informed decision about her baby. In any case, she surrenders the small Santa child and walks away from history.

“Please sir, Take care of my child  and protect him from the dangers of the Mountain of the Whispering Winds. He will be exceptional if only given only given the love he needs”

Yup, even in Claymationland a baby ONLY needs love. Love fixes everything. Yada-yada.. another birthmother is quickly written out of the story and completely forgotten.

The Kringle Elves As Adoptive Parents

OMG! The elves lived in RAINBOW River Valley!! This really is all too easy!

So, the forest social worker animals leave the baby with the elves. Again, no home study, five brothers and an old women; clearly all overweight? No age requirements. I know it’s claymation, but really? Are we actual expected to believe  that a bunch of freaking squirrels and chipmunks are a good judge of character? But that’s what happened. The forest animals bring the baby to the “nice” elves.

Tanta Kringle did not seem to have an issue with the fact that they just found a baby. Actually, she seemed to think like many, “Oh a baby. What a WONDEFUL idea!”. Yes, I’ll take him. Yup.. Santa’s Gotcha day!

When Santa’s original name was pointed out by one of the elves, she replied like many adoptive parents as well, especially the ones that adopt from overseas:

 ”Claus? What an unusual name! However( screw that weird shit), we shall call him Kris. Kris Kringle”

Santa Claus; the People Pleasing “Happy” Adoptee

Now, Santa must have been one of those adoptees that didn’t openly suffer a “Primal Wound”, though we can easily say that he sure fit the bill of being a “people pleaser”!  Hello.. did we ever stop to think about why Santa feels the need to constantly be giving presents? Buying peoples affection?  Not worthy of their friendship and love without the material gifts? Santa literally buys his way out of everything and wins over everyone, including the future Mrs. Claus, with gifts! I’m sorry, it’s just not a healthy way to live.

Nope, no one can tell you are adopted santa

There are other ways where we can see the adoption clearly affecting Santa’s early years.

Clearly, the opportunity to have a genetic mirror was lost as Kris was way taller than all those tiny elves and he was crazy younger. There was no Mr. Kringle, so he couldn’t have been passed as a “change of life” baby. Not that they tried to obviously hid that he just appeared on the doorstep. However, we don’t see what happened behind closed doors. Sadly, we see little of his childhood years and Santa’s autobiography is still forthcoming. However, there is one scene that is also quite poignant in Santa Claus’ Adoptee story.

Santa doesn't fir in with his adopted family Tanta Kringle makes a very typical adoption mistake and assumes that HER Kringle family history is also Kris’ family history. The Kringle family history, “The First Toymakers for the King” ,is obviously important enough that it even got its own song! Now of course, she includes Kris in all the “we” talk, but while Kris can be proud of his adopted linage, it’s still him trying to fit into his adopted family values of being the “first toymakers to the King” In some ways, it really is an awful lot of expectations to place on a child! The dolls MUST smile, the boats MUST float, etc.

However,  while we see no signs of Santa wanting to know the story of his relinquishment or search for his identity, and he happily puts on his “real Kringle suit” in yet another attempt to fit in. Ok, so it can be seen that Tanta Kringle was just making Kris a suit as a kind gesture, but also could it be that she wanted to make Kris seen as a Kringle before he went out in the world? Is she trying to somehow make sure he knows “who took him in, who taught him to read, wiped his butt, etc.” And yes, Kris was very thankful and even continued on to grow a beard because; “Since I am a Kringle, I had to grow one sooner or later.” No mention that the Kringle beards were all pure white and Santa was originally quite a ginger!

Shush.. no one can tell you are adopted,  Kris!

Santa Claus “Real Identity” No OBC Here

Now, we will give it to Tanta Kringle, she didn’t hid this original name tag deep in the linen closet or burn it, but kept it for him in a special place (close to her heart!) around her own neck. So she could whip it out when the Kringle name was gonna get Santa ass back in the pooky.

“Not call myself Kringle. What other name would suit me?”

“There is one. You were wearing this when we found you as a baby. See what it says?”

“Claus? Claus?” Asks Santa pensively… he almost looks triggered for a second.

“You’re real name. You must use it now.”

So even if Santa didn’t search, he still has his original identity returned to him.

I can go on and on with that all day. I had half a thought to play with the fact that the elves (adoption) are all happy and brightly colored while the Sombertown folks (assuming that is Santa’s original kinfolks of sorts) are all dark and dreary, but while amusing, it might be considered reaching. Perhaps I should add this happy tale to the reasons why I thought it was a good idea to relinquish my child to adoption? I always blamed “after school specials and made for TV movies” but Santa Claus is Coming to Town is a happily ever after Adoptee story, too!

It’s still my favorite Christmas Special and I have to say that there is one very, very important lesson that must be taken from the story that can used as  a mantra just like  ”Just Keep Breathing.”

“Just Put One Foot in Front of Another”

Come on!  Sing it with me. I know you want to.

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Claudia Corrigan DArcy

About Claudia Corrigan DArcy

Claudia Corrigan D’Arcy has been online and involved in the adoption community since early in 2001. Blogging since 2005, her website Musings of the Lame has become a much needed road map for many mothers who relinquished, adoptees who long to be heard, and adoptive parents who seek understanding. She is also an activist and avid supporter of Adoptee Rights and fights for nationwide birth certificate access for all adoptees with the Adoptee Rights Coalition. Besides here on Musings of the Lame, her writings on adoption issue have been published in The New York Times, BlogHer, Divine Caroline, Adoption Today Magazine, Adoption Constellation Magazine, Adopt-a-tude.com, Lost Mothers, Grown in my Heart, Adoption Voice Magazine, and many others. She has been interviewed by Dan Rather, Montel Williams and appeared on Huffington Post regarding adoption as well as presented at various adoption conferences, other radio and print interviews over the years. She resides in New York’s Hudson Valley with her husband, Rye, children, and various pets.
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3 Responses to NEWFLASH: Santa Claus is an Adoptee

  1. confused says:

    LMAO!! I just love how you shoot from the hip. This is the first time I’ve ever laughed at this story – I have to admit as an adoptee I’ve always had trouble watching it as I often cried and had to turn it off. “screw that weird shit” just about summarizes the whole real life experience I’m sure for both mothers and their children. Thanks for giving me a Christmas smile when it is usually (along with my birthday) one of “most hor-ri-ble tiiiiiiimes of the year”

  2. JavaMonkey says:

    Claud,

    I knew something was wrong when I noticed that the kid up the street always got more toys than I did. Seriously, Santa? Timmy McCutcheon? That kid spent every Saturday tying firecrackers to cats’ tails. Yet, that rotten brat got more loot than me and all of my friends combined. His friggen stocking weighed 37 pounds on Christmas morning! What a crock!

    What about the Jackson kids? Those kids were saints! They were always doing the right thing and standing up for others. I can see you missing their house ONCE; but every year? That wasn’t a mistake, bro. You were purposefully dissing those kids. What gives?

    Santa (aka Kris) could not even be bothered to look out for one of his own: me. I wished every year to know who my birth family was and that they were okay. Yet, I didn’t get so much as a note of encouragement. I guess he figured he had HIS identifying information. The rest of us could take a hike. The real kicker is that he didn’t even bother to search!

    I can only come to one conclusion: Santa is a bastard.
    Just like me.

    Merry Christmas to you and your family, Claud! Thank you for all that you continue to do for adoptee rights and adoption reform.

    -JM

  3. Lee H. says:

    This was on yesterday and I watched it with my daughter who is sick…Santa is illegitimate, just like me, and you are right…what a people pleaser…just like ME!

    I always loved that story growing up…now I get the why…

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