In the Dark of Night, A Family Shattered
I clung to a small parcel of hope that perhaps there would be decency and justice for Veronica Rose Brown and her father Dusten Brown. I knew it was a long shot. The adoption machine is so very strong in this country, a true evil or corruption and baby buying, of entitlement, or pure desires. I knew that the decks had been stacked against any hope of that Dusten Brown would be able to prevail and actually get the opportunity to raise his daughter. I think I always knew this day was coming, but I had hoped, oh, I had hoped.
I hoped that with so many people galvanized to truly SAVE Veronica Rose from the horrible fate that we saw, that with the power of the Cherokee Nations, with laws on their side, with the media attention to the case, with the undisputed facts and court rulings and two years of successful parenting with her real family that Matt and Melanie Capobianco would eventually just give up and go away as they should. I hoped they would go off and buy another baby, but no, now that hope is lost.
All Hope for Veronica Brown Lost; She Has Been Taken, She Has Been Failed
Yesterday, the OK courts lifted the temporary stay and the “prize” was returned to her rightful owners. After all they wanted her more, they paid more, they fought more, they had more purchased influence on their side, they lied more, they cheated more, they played a dirtier game from the beginning. It is my understand that the US Marshals to physically TAKE Veronica away from her family and there was, as in so many “adoptions” no choice, but let it happen. It was not tribal land. Dusten Brown could have been shot, so he gave in and faced the horrible reality of watching his daughter be taken away.
They might think they have won, but in the end, all have lost.
Another Slave Bought by Adoption
I am so sad for Veronica; having to leave her family, her home, with no one in power looking out for her best interest, her right to be with her family. She is four years old; she will remember.
I am even sad and pity the horrible and pathetic Capobiancos who will not be happy with what they have “won”. Do they think gifts and cookies with help this child get over her trauma? Do they really think that they will have a happy child who loves them and is grateful for their desires, for the fight they played out for ownership of her? Veronica should never be out of therapy now. This is what they have damned her to. Either she will become a complacent adoptee living out to meet their expectations because that is the way of her survival; another victim of adoption Stockholm Syndrome. Or she will find her “Angry Adoptee” early on. She will be angry and fight them, push them away, act out, and never give in. Will they put her on medication by age 6? Perhaps a camp for special adoptees having issue by age 12? Will she start running away by age 16? Will she survive?
That is the final hope now; that Veronica will survive the next 14 years trapped in an adoptive home she never needed. Bought by selfish people who “choose” her. Sold by her mother for a new car and vengeance. And ripped away from a father who fought for her. Veronica is now nothing more than another slave to adoption; bought and sold like chattel. Failed by a system that pretends to protect her. No more rights than a puppy bought at a mill.
There Will Be No Open Adoption
I am sure that the Capobiancos will be completely justified in it, but the fact is Dusten Brown will probably never see his daughter again. They now have possession of her and with South Carolina erroneously breaking their own laws and granting the adoption in July, they have complete legal control. They can continue to do what they want and I am sure they will. Open adoptions are not legally binding at all in South Carolina and they sure didn’t not show any good faith before this all went down. Even before this was a national media case, before the Supreme Court used bias in their ruling, they denied Dusten Brown any visits to his daughter and even the willing Christy Maldonado only saw her daughter twice in the two years Veronica was in their care.
And what can Dusten do now? Just play the game of being a willing grateful birthfather. Now he must suck it up like so many of those false Open Adoptions had had to do before and put on his happy face, pretend to “move on.” If he speaks about his anger or pain, he will be cut out. If he tries to do any more, he will be cut out. If he even looks at them the wrong way, he will be cut out. But, let’s face it.. he will be cut out anyway. He will be lucky if he gets pictures once a year.
No Happily Ever After for Veronica Brown
The Capobiancos will move, get an unlisted number, and use their money to pay for anonymity. They will surround themselves and Veronica by a wall of lies. They will tell her stories until she forgets what is real and what is not. They will buy her shiny trinkets and trips to Disney world, slowly teaching her that money is all that matters, that money can buy false happiness.
But she is now four and she will remember. Oh perhaps Veronica will learn to bury the pain like so many of us do, but it will sit there, deep inside and grow. The heat of her scorched life will not go out, but smolder slowly, the embers waiting until the light of day can fan the flames of truth. No this is not something I wish on her, this is something we all know.
The AdoptionLand Community Mourns
I had a bad feeling last night. The calls went out. It felt like the end times. There was a hint of desperation in the air. I walked away from the computer, could not watch the train wreck, could not sit helpless in New York, while insanity prevailed in Oklahoma. I tried to sleep.
I had dreams all night. Long disturbing dreams where I was anxious. I felt my heart race. I woke up often, tried to unclench my neck muscles relax my balled fists tell myself it was only a dream, don’t cry.
I didn’t want to wake up this morning. The anxiety of the long night had me in its grip. I felt both depressed and uneasy. I put the blankets over my head and cried. My heart missed beats, then shuttered. I had to focus on breathing, slow and steady. I was going to hyperventilate and did not know why. Waves of grief and sadness, panic even, swept upon my shores. So, I stayed in bed, and tried to breath though it, accept whatever I was feeling even though I did not quite know why.
I am thinking now that it was the collective grief of AdoptionLand hitting me while I slept. A collective consciousness of sadness. My inner geek girl can only find this Star Wars quote to explain it:
“I felt a great disturbance in the Force, as if millions of voices suddenly cried out in terror, and were suddenly silenced. I fear something terrible has happened.”
Yes, something terrible has happened. Veronica Rose Brown has been lost to the destruction of Adoption.