Good Byes

So sad………….

My Cat Got Hit by a Car

PuddingHead got taken on the road this afternoon. We lost him. It was snowy today..and I guess with him being all white. I kept watching to see if he went in the road..since he loved to go outside..he always just hung around the back yard. Car 1, Cat 0.

People didn’t either realize or bother to stop. A litte girl in the neighborhood rang the bell and asked if we had a white cat. I hoped it was another one…not our Puddie. But, nah. Poor little guy, couldn’t barely see him across the street..lost in all the snow. Such a sweet little girl to have bothered..she kept on apologizing. So sad.

Scarlett had come with me when the doorbell rang. I went across the street alone to check. She watched from the window, but she stayed calm since I told her not to freak out yet…it might not be him..and then we didn’t have to get Tristan upset. But it was him..so I had to go back in and tell the kids. She cried alot..I don’t think Tristan really gets it yet.

Saying Goodbye to the Kitty

Then we got a box and a towel and I put him in the box and now he is on the front porch. Yeah, I sobbed so loud, so damn loud, in the middle of the cold winter street while doing so…for anyone to see and hear. I brought him in for both kids to see him. Had to cover his face..pretty squished, but other than the snow, his body was OK..so they were able to see that it was him, his tail, his collar, and pet him one last time.

I took the dog out to so she could understand that her buddy was gone. She kept wagging her tail and smelling him, then she sniffed his head a bunch..her tail stopped wagging and she sat there and just looked at me. I took a picture of them together, just the other day. They were both just lying on the couch licking each other…they were such good buddies.

We read “The Tenth Good Thing about Barney”..moved the tissues closer to the couch..and cuddled up.

“Don’t Cry? WTF

I did call Rye hysterically at work…he did say that we would get another kitten. Heart is not so hard after all..lol.

Course then he called my mother-in-law..who annoyed the heck out of me.

“Listen, don’t cry in front of the kids”
“Why shouldn’t I cry in front of them? They are crying. I am crying. It is sad. Our kitten is dead. It’s Ok to cry”
“Well, you should be strong for them”
“There is more strength in feeling our feelings and being able to cry than holding it in and being fake. This is reality. It is sad. I will teach my kids that it is OK to be real and feel. And sadness is also normal and OK.”

Then, I got off the phone with her. It really triggered me to no end.

Scarlett wanted his collar so I gave it to her and she put it in her special box.

I Am Very Sad

Pudding head was a very good cat. He was sleek…like a slinkey.. and soft and had the most incredible blue eyes. He purred real loud the minute you picked him up and didn’t mind it when you made him dance. He was so cute to watch when he wrestled with LillieBell..they were great buddies. He tolerated the children and never complained about being trapped in the Barbie kitchen oven…or having to wear doll clothes. I liked to hear the songs and stories that Tristan sang to him when they were alone together. It was nice to see him sleeping on the clean towels in the bathroom.

Good-bye Mr. Pudding head…you will be missed.

About the Author

Claudia Corrigan DArcy
Claudia Corrigan D’Arcy has been online and involved in the adoption community since early in 2001. Blogging since 2005, her website Musings of the Lame has become a much needed road map for many mothers who relinquished, adoptees who long to be heard, and adoptive parents who seek understanding. She is also an activist and avid supporter of Adoptee Rights and fights for nationwide birth certificate access for all adoptees with the Adoptee Rights Coalition. Besides here on Musings of the Lame, her writings on adoption issue have been published in The New York Times, BlogHer, Divine Caroline, Adoption Today Magazine, Adoption Constellation Magazine, Adopt-a-tude.com, Lost Mothers, Grown in my Heart, Adoption Voice Magazine, and many others. She has been interviewed by Dan Rather, Montel Williams and appeared on Huffington Post regarding adoption as well as presented at various adoption conferences, other radio and print interviews over the years. She resides in New York’s Hudson Valley with her husband, Rye, children, and various pets.