Adoption Questions and Facts

Frequently Asked Questions About Adoption

Real Adoption Information and Facts on Adoption

They don’t teach the facts about adoption in school. There are no courses in college unless you go into a master level in Social work and even then it is limited. Most people go thought life thinking what they hear about adoption form the media, or even worse, from the adoption industry that supplies the message to the media is true. They would be wrong.

Then, when people find themselves about to enter the word of adoption, they go to the “trusted professionals” . Again, most of these sources have their own agenda for keep “on message” as the professionals make their living form the continuation of the adoption status quo. This goes for both prospective adoptive parents and expectant mothers considering adoption.  Neither have any reason to believe that they are being given a sales pitch.

My agenda is to be able to give you information that you won’t find in other places. Why? So that you can have true information based on facts in order to really understand what adoption is, what it  means, how the adoption industry works and what people really think about adoption

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There are No Contracts in Adoption

Actually the word “contract” is not used in adoption legalese due to the nature of who can sign it. See, minors are not allowed to enter a contract under contract law. And since many times women under the age of 18 are encouraged to relinquish their babies to adoption, an “adoption contract” would just not do. So adoption relinquishment consent form is just that; an: adoption relinquishment consent form.


Spouse of A Birthmother Asks: How Do I Tell My Children?

And like many of us affected by adoption, for a spouse of a birthmothers, it helps just to know that one is not alone, which is then altered with the desire to help others also feel that validation and acknowledgment. I do infrequently run into other spouses that wish there was more public support. Perhaps one day we will have something really good for you all. Of course, we’ll have to make it ourselves. The adoption industry probably never will, as then they will have to admit that adoption has long term affects on behalf of relinquishment.


The Good in the Negative

There are many stories that are so much like mine

Other women like me, wounds that don’t heal with time

They made it clear that we had no choice

They took away our child, our life, our voice


Complicated Grief and Complicated Birthmother Diagnosis

It has been well documented that a birth parent that places a child for adoption experiences profound grief and loss, but does the birthmother grief and loss experience fall under a diagnosis of “complicated grief disorder” or “prolonged grief disorder”and do we want it to?


Hard Truths; A Birthmother is Abandoning Her Child

Somewhere inside, they are baby who misses their mothers smell and they don’t have the words to describe that feeling. Someone inside they could be a 3 year old who is scared and angry and wishes that you could come and take them away. Someday, they could turn out to be a person who doesn’t care about stuff, but only wants to fit in with people that get them. Or maybe, just maybe, they think that THEY should have been important enough to warrant a better plan on our part. That THEY were worth working harder, pinching pennies, putting off school, fighting the system, arguing with parents, going on social services.

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Does Voluntary Adoption Relinquishment Save Children from Abuse?

Somewhere along the line the connection has been made that young, unwed mothers with unplanned pregnancies are destined to live a life of poverty and drag their children down with them by abusing their children, resenting their existence, and failing to provide an adequate life. The simple answer is given that if more of these women made adoption plans when facing these unplanned pregnancies then we could prevent future involvement by Child Protective Services and keep these children in ideal homes from the get go, removing the need for Foster homes, and prevent the damage created by the initial abuse. It’s a lovely concept, but like so much in adoption, it is seriously flawed and this belief is not based on fact.