• A Must Read List for Adoption Truths

    • In many states across the USA including New York, Adoptee Rights bills are introduced to state legislators year after year. Due to lack of public support and misinformation based outdated beliefs about the adoption process, year after year, this bills fail to become laws.

    • I am a product of this experiment. I was born on December 24th, 1988 and I was soon transferred from one mother to another because my first mother, known throughout my life as my birth mother, wasn’t married to my birth father. She was 16 years old and still in high school.

    • I was 14 when I learned I was pregnant and my life changed forever. Once I’d gotten that fateful news, I tried to imagine what it would be like to have a baby; I wondered if I’d be able to finish school, would I be able to give my baby the life she deserved?

    • So How Do We Fix Adoption in the USA? Domestic Voluntary Infant Adoption is what we are discussing here. Women facing and unplanned pregnancy and “choose” adoption rather than parenting. If you aren’t aware of adoption facts, then you might not be aware of the need for reform.

    • There are some facts about adoption that, really, you cannot dispute unless you are just trying to purposely to stay ignorant regarding the facts of infant adoption in this country. Adoption is, in its perfect form, suppose to be about finding homes for children that need them, not about finding children for parents that want them.

    • What Happens to the Numbers of Adoptable Infants in the USA if We Compare to Australia? IF the USA had similar adoption practices to Australia and supported mothers, in the US we would have only 539 Voluntary Domestic Infant relinquishments annually give or take.

    • The relinquishment and subsequent adoption of my son was actually picture perfect. I am a perfect example of exactly what adoption is when it works just as it is suppose to.The adoption of my son was perfect, I did everything the “right” way and still; the adoption of my son caused unnecessary pain and was wrong. This is way I speak out against adoption today.

    • Adoption was almost more like a crack that happened in my soul. A crack that that I thought and was encouraged to believe that would be temporary or always below the surface. Over time, the rest of life worked it’s way in, like water in cement and caused the very foundation of myself to crumble.

    • When I relinquished Max, it was suppose to be something that affected ME. Like so many things in adoption, the professionals were wrong. The “gift of adoption” just keep on giving and giving.. the pain has a huge ripple effect that touches every aspect of a woman’s lives including ALL our children.

    • Secondary adoptee rejection is a very real reality in adoption reunions. We all have a different skill set and experiences to handle a reunion.There are many mothers who were simply told to “never speak of this again” and that has proven to be a real unhealthy bit of advice.

    • The simple fact is that it is less than 1% of all relinquishing mothers desire to never set eyes on their children again. So because these 1% mothers another 6 to 8 million people and their children and their children’s children get denied medical histories, get denied their identity, get denied their truth..

    • Most adoption agencies will offer free “birthmother” counseling as part of their adoption services. A true counselor is supposed to advocate for their client, not the organization for which they work. Often adoption counseling is “in agency” and therefore, not really nonpartisan. There is no guarantee that the “counselor” is neutral and actually has the expectant mothers’ best interests at heart.

    • I figured that I would write a post that makes it easier for women to become birthmothers. Hence, here’s a handy guide on how to become more appealing to adoption agencies and ways to ensure that you will place your baby.

Brooklyn New York Adoptee Rights Protest

Local New York Adoptee Rights Protest for OBC Access

  • Who:     NY’s Unsealed Initiative: www.unsealedinitiative.org
  • When: Sunday September 29th, 2013 at 12:30pm
  • Where: NY State Assemblywoman Helene E. Weinstein’s Brooklyn, NY district office at 3520 Nostrand Avenue Brooklyn, NY 11229
  • Why:     She is THE biggest opponent  to NY Bill of Adoptee Rights Legislation

Why Are We Just Going after Helen Weinstein?

Helen Weinstein denies adoptees their civil rights in NYHelen Weinstein has repeatedly prevented New York State’s  Bill of Adoptee Rights from moving forward for a vote on the assembly floor. SHE is the obstacle.

Once again Brooklyn Assemblymember Helene Weinstein, Chair of Judiciary Committee, has stepped in to hold A909 from advancing to the assembly floor for a vote. She has stymied our legislation and continues to say the birth parents were promised confidentiality which we know is not the case. Every non-adopted person can easily obtain their original birth certificate. Adult adoptees should have that same right. Having one class of people treated differently than another based on the circumstances of their birth is the definition of discrimination. This is a violation of adopted citizen’s civil rights!

New York, being New York, is also VERY IMPORTANT to the rest of the countries fight to restore OBC access to adopted people. If NY was to restore adoptees civil rights, other states could turn quicker. New York, it has been said, “sets the tone”.

Do You Want Your Birth Certificate from New York State?

Then make it so! Make this important. Do NOT make excuses! Please join us and let our voices be heard! We can no longer just sit back and say “pass this!” We have WORK to do!

If you cannot be there in person, please write her, call her, email her. As her “concern” is the adoption mythology of “birthmother privacy” , if you have a particular point to make on that side of the issue, it would be best.

Email Helen Weinstein about the need to support adoptee rights at: WeinstH@assembly.state.ny.us

Helen Weinstein’ s District Office

  • 3520 Nostrand Avenue
  • Brooklyn, NY 11229
  • 718-648-4700

Helen Weinstein’ s Albany Office

  • LOB 831
  • Albany, NY 12248
  • 518-455-5462

Below is Assemblywoman Helene E. Weinstein’s contact/address information page where you can also fill out her contact form and email her that way.
http://assembly.state.ny.us/mem/Helene-E-Weinstein/contact/

Need to now more about the Battle to Free Adoption Records in New York?

The history of sealed adoption records in the US and the current battle in New York’s legislation to free them in parts I, II and II.

 

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Claudia Corrigan DArcy

About Claudia Corrigan DArcy

Claudia Corrigan D’Arcy has been online and involved in the adoption community since early in 2001. Blogging since 2005, her website Musings of the Lame has become a much needed road map for many mothers who relinquished, adoptees who long to be heard, and adoptive parents who seek understanding. She is also an activist and avid supporter of Adoptee Rights and fights for nationwide birth certificate access for all adoptees with the Adoptee Rights Coalition. Besides here on Musings of the Lame, her writings on adoption issue have been published in The New York Times, BlogHer, Divine Caroline, Adoption Today Magazine, Adoption Constellation Magazine, Adopt-a-tude.com, Lost Mothers, Grown in my Heart, Adoption Voice Magazine, and many others. She has been interviewed by Dan Rather, Montel Williams and appeared on Huffington Post regarding adoption as well as presented at various adoption conferences, other radio and print interviews over the years. She resides in New York’s Hudson Valley with her husband, Rye, children, and various pets.
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2 Responses to Brooklyn New York Adoptee Rights Protest

  1. Pingback: 2013 Adoptee Rights Demonstration Reflections; Claud's Atlanta Adventure Story | Musings of the Lame

  2. Poll says:

    Dear Claudia,

    I assume this will be routed to your e-mail, and you may simply want to delete this comment as it will be off topic. I want to assure you this is not another string of comments and you won’t have to close off comments on this post.

    First of all, I want to say I am sorry. I do really enjoy intellectual debates, and I thought others were having fun. (Mother forced me to join the debate club as a teen because I was so annoying. Love to debate politics, ect.) And I was procrastinating on a writing deadline.

    However, that was no excuse for my insensitivity. I assumed people were having fun, like me. Later I looked at facebook, and saw that people were genuinely offended. And, largely, misunderstanding my posts. Which, shouldn’t be a surprise to me, as a string of hastily written comments are going to come across as rather incomprehensible.

    “Hmm.. yeah. I would say there are “defog” stages… like 1st OMG you have no idea what you are talking about!! Then 2: You are crazy! then 3: oh maybe it does make sense… to wow. yeah that IS wrong.. to im’ hurt.. then bitter.. then angry.. then STFU and then eventually I THINK accepting where others are… at least I TRY to be like that! lol Would be a good thing to crowd source for others experiences for sure!”

    Oh, I’m sorry. I was just having fun. I thought you all were too. I have fun arguing.

    I actually had read your experience, and later I read Mystery’s. One of the most confusing things for me was how a woman could be so confused and coerced. I understood the mental depression/ panic disorder/ PTSD/ anxiety/ denial-that-I’m-pregnant aspect of the situation. But Mystery’s story conveyed the brainwashing of a religious community, ineffective parents, and reluctance/ inability to set boundaries and clarify her own wishes. (i.e.- Getting back on the plane to go to New Zealand.) I appreciated learning about your experiences and thank you for sharing them.

    The ugly babies. :) Ah, sorry about that. I am not a baby person. Someone had said that I wanted “a womb fresh baby” which I thought was amusing. I also thought you would find it amusing, as you mentioned that you would like to be childless in another life. I am just simply not a baby/toddler person, although I’ll fake it for friends. The only baby I would be happy with would be my own. But you all _are_ baby people. Again, I am sorry for any insult or hurt I caused.

    And that put the light bulb on. That was why you (and Mystery) didn’t get an early abortion. You are a baby person, yet didn’t live in a community/family (African American or otherwise) that would have supported you keeping your baby as a young woman.

    I also didn’t understand the differences in personality for other 18 year olds. It is very hard for me to understand the lack of ability to advocate for oneself and set boundaries. From age 15-25 my friends were involved in activist causes (AIDS awareness, NARAL, anarchist clubs, volunteers.) The inability to clearly say to people, “I am not going to do XYZ” or even “back off” is hard for me to understand. (It was extraordinarily hard for me to understand that a pregnant woman could give birth to her own baby, and yet tell people she was willing to adopt when she was not willing to do so.) Thank you (And Mystery on her blog) for sharing that information. But you all did convey that — and I appreciate your trying to communicate it to someone who is rather thick-headed.

    There are things your community does not understand about other issues (and I do think there is misdirected anger) but like rape victims space is required. I am sorry I invaded that space as something other then a therapist/ sympathizer.

    We will probably never fully understand each other, but I support your efforts to help young women make a real choice about parenting without pressure or coercion. All the best, and sorry for the deluge of comments this last weekend and I promise, no more comments. :)

    Best, Poll

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